It Carries

Lack of sleep plus exuberant amounts of heat during the day added to strenuous labor equals a very tired, very confused, very uncordinated Nathan. I must say that I'm quite glad that I only have a week more of this before I go back to school. I can't complain about the pay, but the hours and the heat wear a guy out!

My concentrations as of late have been a bit mixed. I feel drawn to thoughts about failed relationships and who I need to be, but I find those to be a waste of time most of the time. I never really solve any of my problems delved in thoughts like that. Most of the time I just stumble upon truths that I would have rather remained ignorant to. But I also find myself at a new disatisfaction with my relationship with Christ. These disatisfactions more often than not proove to be healthy though. At these points in my life I realize new things that have been apart of me that must be put off, and for the better. The main theme for me, atleast for this year, has been discipline. I feel that if I can discipline my everyday structure in all aspects of life, I will be better equiped to face the stormy spiritual seas. I need to be firm in my principles and love. I need to not waver every time confrontation rears it's hideous head. I need to be able to deal with my emotions instead of hiding them away all the time. Those are my main concerns. Those are the things that I feel are in the way of me seeing Christ clearly. I cater them and I let them distract me. I must discipline myself to defeat them but still keep my character... That could be tuff.

Anyways, another hot day tomorrow. Oh please let it rain! Peace and love.