What Can I Say?!?

ya know, this summer has been kind of a bit lacking from what it started out to be. everyone was here and there was always something for me to do after work... but now everyone is working or gone and i have nothing to do. there's alot of personal undertakings going on in my life, but y'all are going to have to miss out on those details being that this is a public journal. all i can tell you is this. there are some things that a man has to do in life even though he is afraid to do them. that's just the way it has to work. today i closed the pool becaus of rain and all of us took the day off. i'm learning to be a little more assertive in my work, but i really don't enjoy it. i consider it to be good ra training though. i've got to learn to be hard sometimes. for my day of though, i didn't really do much which was a nice change of pace. i went to the bank and wrote some music down by the lake. i was kind of flattered when i found that i had drawn a bit of a crowd of not just people, but fish and ducks alike. but after that i just went home and layed around. about 9:30 i decided to go to the book store to look around and i ended up getting some german language learning cd's. i've always wanted to learn german and now is my chance. anyways, not much else is going on. i don't know how i feel right now, but i know i don't feel like myself. it's been weird. for the past couple of days i really haven't felt like me and i think it's because of that whole personal issue. i'm really interested to see how that turns out, and if you ever catch me in person i might tell you, but that's NOT a promise. don't worry too much though. i don't mean to make you hang in anticipation, but that's just a big part of what's going on right now. speaking of which, i went through my private journals last night and it was a huge eye-opener on how much i've grown in just the past few years. my attitude is WAY different now, and it was kind of re-assuring to discover. oh yeah, and today i also went to play disc golf on the back nine, and i could have sworn that i played with bill gates. this guy asked me to join his group. he was with another woman and a man and they both reffered to him as bill, but he introduced himself to me as william. he looked like bill gates... he talked like bill gates... and he was wearing a huge microsoft t-shirt. he wasn't that bad at disc either, but they were playing from the hard pads and it through my game all off. oh well, i'm sure i'll go back again tomorrow after work. i'm going to bed now though. i have to wake up at 8 to be at work by 9 because of swim lessons. but before i retire i'd like to give a special shout out to cowboy for responding to my journal. that tickles me pink y'all... it really does. so to ye all have a grand night and i'll see (or maybe not see) you all in the morning... peace and love...