well, i know i said i wasn't going to write a journal this weekend, but it's valentines day and i just can't see myself NOT saying anything about it. don't worry, i'm not going to rip it apart at the seams, even though it is my least favorite of holidays, but i will say both positive and negative things about it. single awareness day, or valentines day as some may call it, is one of those holidays that i was indifferent to until this year. it seems that so many people have placed emphasis on it this particular year that i couldn't help but be draged in in some small way. for me, valentines is an elementary school holiday, simply meaning that i only remember celibrating it in elementary school when i got my fingers all sticky with glue and glitter making a heart valentines card and little pink decorations to go on my valentines shoe box. this is where the cards/candy from everyone in the class would go the next morning. the competition was to simply have the coolest cards, and to write an extra word in the card for the girl that you liked. i always remember doing that, but it seemed like i never got a card back from that girl, and come to mention it, i think that must be why i have such an inferiority complex when it come to women. i was scarred at an early age. after the fourth grade though, no more cupcakes, no more cards and shoe boxes, and no more necco sweethearts (i LOVE those thigs, i buy em every week and am gunna stock up on em on clearance sale). all we really did after that was stand back and admire the hanging decorations from the cafeteria celing. that was the end of valentines day for me. from then on, it was only celibrated by couples who just happened to be dating that week, and then the girl would usually break up with the guy or whatever. for the most part, i really don't think most guys are fond of valentines day. it is an excuse to buy a girl flowers, and thus purchase the key to her admiration, but money doesn't buy happiness therefore that admiration is very superficial. now a-days, those silly little decorations still hang out in the cafeteria, and today new couples were walking around all over the place. i was still observing from affar the phanominon that is valentines day... here are the events of this day. i woke up at about noon and haveing camped out in the quad with some guys in my new tent, proceeded to put it away and come inside to take a shower and warm my feet. my feet got cold cause i went barefoot like an idiot the last night, and they never warmed up untill my 30 minute shower. after that i suppose i layed around for a while and wandered from room to room seeing what all my other single brethren were doing. seeing as they were doing the same as i, i just returned to my room and slept until dinner. at dinner i went to the caf with clayton. we noticed that the lights had been dimmed and they were serving a special fattening meal with live music. as i glanced around the room, i noticed that most people were unhappy and alone, possibly clinging to their social group of all guys or all girls, and eating as much as they could to, i suppose, eat away their sorrow. after that i went to work. i watched field of dreams, and total recal. i suppose the television stations understood my pain, as they offered what every single guy wants on valentines day... night... low budget blood and gore. i did get to talk to a girl back home about dating, where we've been and where we are going in life. that was nice and relaxing and helped me sort through . i also got a valentines card from someone else back home who knows who they are, as well as i do because of the mail stamp. anyways, thankyou very much. it helped part the clouds on this gloomy holiday. when i got off of work, i watched a depressing movie with some of the guys. it was called the hours and was pretty much about death and suicide. that was uplifting in every way shape and form (strong sarcasm), but i don't recomend you see it if you wish to feel good about yourself. i suppose this leads me up to now. i am sitting here writing about valentines day and am about to go play cards with the fellas. did i say i was going to talk equally in a positive sense about valentines day? i can't remember... oh well, all you ladies back home know i love you and look out for you the best i can. i know that sometimes my actions towards you don't portray that in the best way, but i want you all to know that all of you are my girls and if i could have i would have sent each and every one of you a dozen roses and chocolates. peace and love...